July 23, 2019 Bus and Bridges

Today was pretty decent. During the late afternoon, I blamed the decency on the Astrological lineup of <Sun trine Moon>. I’ve been noticing that whenever that occurs, things are generally setup for some pleasantness (at least for me – but that seems like it would be a ‘generalized pleasentness’ for possibly a majority).

One good thing was my afternoon quasi-nap. Might have dozed a little bit, but I also lied in bed for some time allowing my mind to quiet more. It may be a longer process than I generally appreciate, and it could be the case that falling prey to addictive behaviors for a day or two (or longer) may take more than a day for the effects to wear off.

Just like nicotine withdrawls. Haha maybe for the first time I could say “I am thankful for experiencing quitting smoking repeatedly to experience what a nicotine withdrawl is like,” because I’m pretty sure it may just be relatedly similar to any kind of “addictive behavior withdrawl,” and from my perspective, the ‘instant gratification’ push and ‘addiction society’ continues to try to leap forward, but it will only be able to go so far without a major crash.

I saw the cute coffee girl on my bus ride and walk. I stopped by and crossed over a neat-o bridge and took a photo with a caption I added: “man i sure do love bridges. definitely dont spend enough time hanging out with them.”

Found a good children’s book called “A Snicker of Magic” or something like that. Seems legit. Read more of “Unfettered Mind” which has some very good mental strategies, and I think even a section that looks very much like it’s talking about Manifestation and laws of Karma, which is neat considering supposedly how old the book is, and from a Zen Master.

Let’s finish this scattered post by advocating that we continue to stay away from distractive / addictive behavior. And continue to push for the belief that I can play Classic Wow without the addiction lol, and get more into my defined phrase of “Imaginative Practice.”

Cause Imagination is more important than knowledge. Einstein said so, and I agree with much curiosity. Understatement.

P.S. If there are any continued readers, I want to add especial for you that some of my posts may be chaotic, but right now my intention with the blog is almost purley quantity over quality, because I want to build the habit of ‘write write write’ with some consistency. Don’t know why I feel compelled to add that, but at the very least it is a good note for my self. 🙂

July 15, 2019 The Unfettered Mind Go Go Go

I’m recording a video for potential youtube use at the same time that I am writing in this blog and eating a pizza.  So you could this a transcript, but I am also curious to see where it goes.

Because in the past, I have often times very much enjoyed typing as I was focused on something else other than the words on the screen.  For example, I am now looking at my facial expression and actually I’m looking pretty sexy, almost like a Matthew Mcconahay (spelled that wrong) who just got out of the shower.

Very fucking refreshing shower it was too, because after my shift at Trackers, I was feeling fucked up again, in the head, hating on Portland and the Trackers job and anyone who i feel like i have to tap-dance my speech and self expression around because i may not be using their preferred words or behavior.  But shit……let me bow out of that direction and speech for now.

 

What I did want to talk about more importantly was the autopilot mode i’ve been on….ok I just finished the 5 minute video.  Eating pizza and talking and trying to type was becoming a little too much, but the top may be like a transcript.

I did lose a little focus in what I wanted to talk about, but I sort of finished the video with an intention, so I’ll finish this post with an intention.  Daniel…don’t lose yourself to hating on Portland because of some of the frustrations you experience with things like traffic, with things like some (or even if it’s many) of the people you have encountered.  You *could* even just look at it as the initial hurdles one has to get over when moving to a new place…like running the gauntlet in a fraternity.

Because this place of Portland *could* be fucking awesome.  You love the street lights.  You love the mornings and evenings, many of the parks, and the bridges.  There is still a lot of potential here, so please please please don’t lose yourself to the things that you are not liking.  Also anyone reading this of the physical or non-physical variety that could offer support or encouragement, I’d love to receive it.

Thank you.  /Bow.

March onward, Heroes, X-Men, etc.  You fucking rockstars.

P.S.  I did want to mention that where I currently am is really neat relative (generally my life fucking sucks so I stress *relative* here) compared to the last post, because i have been going more in the route of small choices and a more automated pace of go go go without much thought.  Similar to the “Unfettered Mind,” a Zen book that I was flipping through today.

P.P.S.  In addition to what I said above about Portland, it does seem to be a reoccurring pattern of mine is that I will go somewhere kinda neat or start something cool, and I’ll just focus on the shitty aspects until I hate the place and then want to move on.  I’m not quite sure how to change this, but it does seem like a very important battle of my life.